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Desperate Angel

By Benxiao Ma

Epilogue: Redemption

Sonaris yawned lazily, leaning back in his chair on top of his mechanic shop in the sullen and cloudy summer day. But he enjoyed that kind of weather the most, it wasn’t too hot out and was a pleasant temperature, as well the clouds were nice to watch. But as relaxing as a setting it was, Sonaris wasn’t very relaxed at all. Maria climbed up the stairs to the roof to check up on the black-haired man, however she swore that he was sprouting new grey hairs every couple of days, now with a much more predominant streak of silver in his bangs.

“Are you ok, Sonaris? You look rather…Stressed,” Maria asked concernedly. Sonaris paused in all movements before turning around in a very mechanical fashion, a look of sheer and utter stress etched into his face. Maria backed away in surprise, Sonaris looked more like one of the undead if anything else.

“Maria…” Sonaris whispered, his voice strained in tone. “Why…Did I hire those two in my shop?” He asked, Maria blinking, unable to answer the rhetorical question.

On cue, the entire shop shook violently, an explosion shattering the tranquil moment instantly, smoke bellowing out of the open windows of the first floor. After that all that could be heard was Yasosume shouting things like, “I didn’t do it!” and Ethernial shouting, “Yes you did!”.

Sonaris slowly turned away to look at the sky, trying to block out the sounds, Maria taking a seat next to him.

“Ever since Tikai left with the Starblade, I had to hire those two to keep in business. But they break more than what they can fix! I’m starting to lose customers and profits, again!” Sonaris grumbled, sliding off his chair slightly. Maria blinked at the strange sight and tried her best to sympathize with him, but it was ultimately impossible to fix the damage done to his pride. Sonaris sighed quietly and glanced around at his surroundings again, now the sky was beginning to get blackened out by the smoke coming from his shop.

“It’s been an entire year since Tikai left here…” Maria pointed out, Sonaris nodding his head very mechanically in response.

* * *

“What are you doing?! And what do you mean Seraph ran away?!” Sonaris demanded as Tikai was quickly throwing all of her possessions into a small suitcase, since all she had were some tools and a few sets of clothing to put away.

“I’m going to take the Starblade and find Seraph!” She shouted back at him, to which Sonaris looked shocked.

“But how am I supposed to run the shop?!”

“Get Yasosume and Ethernial!”

“But they destroy more things than fix!”

“You’ll be fine!”

“I’ll be broke!” Sonaris sighed heavily and shook his head, he knew that there was no way he could stop her departure.

“Well, I know better…” Sonaris muttered. “It’d be easier to move the heavens instead of changing your mind when you decide on something, especially if it’s about him. But must you go now? Can’t you at least stay here and train them for me?” Sonaris pleaded, Tikai shaking her head.

“I have to go chase after him as soon as we get to Lutenia. I just hope you can understand,” Tikai replied solemnly, pausing in her work for a moment to look over at Sonaris, who had taken to a seat in the room.

“I don’t understand, and I know I never will. What I do understand is that you have your reasons, so I wish you good luck. Make it back one of these days, I can’t baby-sit you anymore now,” Sonaris warned, waving his hand around wearily.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. I’ll be back as soon as I can!”

* * *

“It’s been a year…It felt longer…” Sonaris muttered, slowly prying himself off and out of his chair. “I need to go fix whatever it is that broke this time…” With a heavy sigh Sonaris moved his way back into the shop, amidst all of the shouting and explosions.

* * *

“What…WHAT IS THIS?! ‘You owe me five hundred dollars?!’” Yasosume raged, looking at the contents of her ‘pay check’ from Sonaris.

“Mine says, ‘congratulations, you broke even,’” Ethernial jumped in, unsure of how to react with his pay check. Sonaris, who was seated down at the dining table was trying his best to ignore the daggers being shot out of Yasosume’s eyes. Finally, Sonaris looked over and glowered at the redhead, eyes dead serious.

“You. Owe. Me. Money,” was all that Sonaris replied with. Yasosume once again protested rather vocally, arms waving around and things of the sort. Sonaris turned to look back at the vixen again and spoke in the same monotonic voice.

“You owe me money because you destroy more than what you can repair,” Sonaris explained, speaking very slowly to emphasize his point.

“I’ve gotten better! It’s only half the time things explode! The other half I fix things right back up again!” Yasosume protested, Sonaris letting out a heavy sigh and standing up. He walked over to a trophy case he had built, on it were a few random mechanical objects.

“Need I remind you that the simple water boiler you ‘fixed’ suddenly began to spit fire during use?!” Sonaris glowered once again, Yasosume’s glance quickly shifting off of the black haired man.

“That…Was just a strange coincidence…” Yasosume muttered back, Sonaris pointing to a piece of shrapnel.

“And that was all we could find after that airship engine you ‘repaired’ spontaneously combusted as we moved it!” Sonaris growled, his fangs of teeth showing. Ethernial interrupted at that point, motioning towards a charred black stump of something.

“What was that one?” He inquired.

“My pencil holder,” Sonaris replied flatly, Ethernial blinking, dumbfounded by the information. “So until you two stop destroying everything that gets sent in here, you guys won’t be paid a penny!” Sonaris declared, Yasosume grumbling angrily, a few curses escaping her from under her breath. Ethernial gave a few sheepish pats on the back to Yasosume, who appreciated the gesture but was still angry.

“Great, can’t buy anything with this…” She muttered grudgingly.

“Look at it like this, you still have a place to stay around here,” Ethernial pointed out.

“I don’t even know why I stayed here so long,” Yasosume grumbled, then glancing over at Ethernial and laughing quietly. “Oh that’s right, because you wanted to stay here,” Yasosume added, Ethernial looking away quickly.

“Well it’s not like Lutenia is a bad place to live…” Ethernial muttered quietly.

Sonaris in the meantime looked out of the window and took note of the weather as it was slowly getting darker and cloudier. He decided to take advantage of the weather before it started to rain. Sonaris decided to leave his two employees and enjoy the scenery, and relax before dealing with business matters again. As he moved to the door, Maria stopped him by handing him an umbrella.

“If you get stuck in the rain,” she said, Sonaris taking the umbrella and throwing it over his shoulder before giving a wave and heading out the door.

::Well, I must admit, I am enjoying only dealing with such trivial things. But I suppose I do miss some of the hectic things in life…:: As Sonaris continued to reminisce on his walk through the city his nerves began to slowly unwind themselves, at the same time the clouds also began to dissipate, the chances of it raining were slim to none by the time Sonaris returned from his brief walk. He paused outside of the shop’s door, deciding to go around to the back to get a view of the lake before having to deal with his disgruntled mechanics.

“I picked a good place to build my shop, the view is always so relax-” Sonaris paused in mid-sentence as he noticed an object approaching at high speed. He stood fixated by the sight, watching it as it came closer and so he could start making out the details of the object. As it got closer to the shop Sonaris was able to start making out the features. It was a sleek design, rather flat, had two sets of pointed wings, in short it was Tikai’s ship, the Starblade, and to Sonaris’ dismay, it was coming straight at him. Sonaris was entirely convinced that the ship was going to smash through his shop, even if his shop was bordering on the edge of bankruptcy it was still where he lived. At the last second the ship pulled up and collided with the lake’s surface, in effect creating a miniature tidal wave to go towards the shore. Sonaris watched the water wearily, all of his stress and worries flooding back to him, and with the flick of a wrist he had opened up the umbrella Maria gave him and raised it over his head.

“It’s always me, every bloody time,” Sonaris grumbled as the water collapsed onto him.

* * *

Twenty minutes after Tikai’s grand entrance was ‘announced’ by her splashdown back onto the ground, everyone had gathered on the second floor of the shop in the dining room, sitting around a table all exchanging some glances between themselves. Sonaris glowered at everybody at the table, he was damp, soggy and stressed, anyone who so happened to make eye contact with him would get a death glare that could slay armies. Ethernial was contently talking to Tikai who was recalling on various stories from her year of globetrotting, all the while Yasosume was shooting daggers at Tikai, who was completely oblivious to the fact.

“Oh, sorry about that, Sonaris…” Tikai quickly apologized, realizing what she did to him. “Something was stuck in the engine of the ship so I was having problems trying to go for a proper landing…” Tikai explained, Sonaris nodding his head very slowly, trying his best to keep calm.

“Hey, Tikai,” Ethernial jumped back into the conversation. “Did you ever find Seraph?” He asked, Tikai’s eyes wandering for a moment at the question.

“No, I never did. I would always get close to it though. In the cities I travelled too there were always rumours of a blue-haired demon that would travel through cities and solve crisis situations that would come up. But I guess I just missed him, for all I know he could’ve snuck away with that armor of his. I just wish I could’ve at least seen him with my own two eyes,” Tikai sighed heavily and leaned back in her chair, closing her eyes and thinking for a moment.

“I wonder where he is now…” Tikai muttered under her breath, another sigh escaping her. “I’m going to go take a walk around town, I miss Lutenia to be honest.”

* * *

::How long…How long have I been wandering now…?:: Seraph, the blue-haired demon was walking right down the streets of Lutenia in broad daylight. His body was weak and worn, his soul was even more battered and bruised from his treks.

::I don’t know how I came back here…I don’t even know why. I’ve travelled across the world trying to find a purpose in helping those around me. But none of it felt true to me. So I suppose I’m back to where this all started…:: Seraph mused to himself quietly. ::All I know is how to fight, how to battle, but now that I don’t have too, I feel so lost…How do I live?:: Seraph’s footsteps suddenly stopped themselves as he realized something. ::Maybe…Maybe…I’m just not meant to live then?” Seraph shook his head and continued to walk along. He continued to wrestle with his mental anguish, but ultimately he wasn’t as confident and determined to continue searching for a purpose any longer.

::No…Not yet…I can’t…I have to keep trying! I said that I would become a better person for Tikai…:: Seraph determined with all of his remaining determination and will. ::But…I suddenly don’t know if even that is enough to keep me going now…:: The demon’s ears lowered momentarily at the thought, but suddenly they perked up, Seraph spinning around to see what it was that could arose his senses. What he saw across the street from him was the she-devil herself, Tikai, just as casually as he was strolling down the sidewalk across from him.

All of Seraph’s nerve was instantly stripped from him at the sight of the blond, the demon quickly shoving through the crowds to run away, ashamed at how miserable he looked.

::Damnit! I’m so spineless! I can’t even face her if she really shows up!:: Seraph growled lowly, angry at himself and his stupidity.

* * *

::What was that?:: Tikai wondered, seeing a sudden movement in the corner of her eye. She looked over and saw nothing among the crowds of people, until she noticed the glint of silver in the sunlight. She looked closer at the source and noticed two black flaps waving in motion, a trademark of Seraph’s uniform.

::Seraph?! Are you here?:: Tikai quickly began to give chase, it was worth the effort even if it turned out to be some person with a similar ensemble. She followed the man into an alley where she noticed the sky had become cloudy again, and by moving among the shadows she couldn’t see who she was chasing clear enough to tell.

“Seraph! Is that you?!”

* * *

::Damnit, damnit! What kind of fate is this?! Destiny? Destiny?! My destiny seems to be tormented for all of eternity!:: Seraph kept running as fast as his body would go, but with all of the strain he put on it and the fact Tikai’s body was like his, a hybrid despite the human appearance she had, it was difficult to keep ahead.

Seraph didn’t respond to the question, he was hoping the sudden change in weather to become dark would be enough to cloak him long enough until he could make a distraction.

“Damnit! I know it’s you, Seraph! Stop running!” Tikai shouted, her voice angry and impatient. Seraph ignored her and kept on running, glancing up at the sky to take note of the fact it was starting to rain. Tikai reached out to grab onto Seraph’s uniform, but at the last second she lost her footing due to the rainwater that collected on the ground. She fell onto the damp ground, unable to keep up with Seraph as he turned a corner. Tikai eventually leapt to her feet and followed the demon’s path, turning around the corner only to find an empty dead-end alley before her. She looked at the scene in front of her for a long time, unable to believe that Seraph had slipped away yet again, not to mention totally unsure of why he would run from her anyway.

“Airaxen…” Tikai whispered quietly. “What in the world are you thinking about?”

* * *

Seraph had hid behind a dumpster in the alley, remaining motionless as he listened to Tikai’s footsteps approach, stop and finally fade away as she left. The demon lowered his head and let out a sigh.

::Who am I kidding? I can’t face Tikai! She was just behind me and I ran! I have to face reality, I don’t know how to live a life, I only can fight, and now that I don’t have any battles to fight what purpose could I possibly serve? I couldn’t even find one in a year of travel! I suppose maybe if I don’t know how to live, it would just be best if I didn’t…:: Seraph sighed to himself at the thought, wanting to go over things yet again and convince himself otherwise, that he could become a better person and face Tikai again, but he couldn’t anymore. The demon laughed quietly to himself, his head lulled to the side and his eyes closed in a moment to reflect. After a few minutes Seraph made a move, taking his left hand and placed it over his right gauntlet. The armor piece glowed and came off of his arm, reshaping itself into a black handgun.

::They say killing yourself is the worst of all sins. I suppose I should just hope that whatever it is that will judge me, will forgive it,:: Seraph laughed quietly at the thought and twirled the handgun around a few times.

“Sorry,” Seraph murmured to no one in particular, lifting the black firearm up to his chin, the barrel pointing upwards to fire through the bottom of his head. With another pause he began to pull on the trigger. But at the last second he was tackled unexpectedly, his shot being severely thrown off and his bullet simply struck into the air. Seraph opened his eyes to find that Tikai was the one who tackled him, she never did leave, only pretending too and coming back with her armor to hover above the ground and approach soundlessly. Tikai pinned both of his arms down and sat on his stomach, able to look him right in the eye. Seraph closed his eyes and turned his head to the side, totally ashamed. Tikai on the other hand looked relieved, even happy despite the fact Seraph almost blew a hole through his head.

“I found you,” Tikai stated softly, a thin smile on her face. Seraph reopened his eyes and glanced up at the blond.

“You cheated.”

* * *

An hour later Tikai returned to the shop, Seraph in tow with a set of chains that she had found in the dumpster. It took a long time for the two to travel through the rain, Seraph kept trying to escape and Tikai had to keep tackling him to the ground, by the time they returned both of them were covered in mud and entirely soaked, and since both of them had fairly long hair, it was covering their faces and it was a miracle either of them could see.

When they entered through the door, all work in the shop stopped, everyone staring at the pair. The shop became dead silent, Ethernial dropping his welder that clattered to the floor, sparking as it made contact.

After their arrival, Sonaris closed down the shop and put all work on hold for the occasion. They all decided to stay on the first floor and sit on top of the hull of a ship they brought in from the rain.

Seraph and Tikai were both given towels to dry up with. Tikai was finished quickly, only having to dry her hair since her armor didn’t need to be dried. Seraph on the other hand was wrapped up in the cloth, he was completely drenched from head to toe.

“So…” Ethernial said, breaking the silence, and getting glances from everyone for it. “Uh, what’s new, Seraph?” He asked sheepishly. The demon raised his sullen eyes to look at Ethernial and then lowered them again.

“Nothing,” Seraph replied flatly, everyone directing their gaze upon him. ::What am I doing here? I don’t belong among these people, they only remember Airaxen, they’re his companions. I…Just don’t belong here,:: Seraph remained silent and continued to look down at his feet, hugging his knees closer to himself.

“Seraph, you should go and clean up a bit,” Sonaris suggested. “It would be more comfortable if you did, I think Maria wouldn’t mind doing something with your uniform,” Sonaris continued, Maria giving him a funny look at the last comment. The demon looked over at Sonaris, then back down, shaking his head.

“I’m alright, don’t worry about me,” Seraph muttered, that comment earned him the worried looks of the other four people.

“Hey, I think you should go change or something, you’ll get sick if you don’t,” Yasosume pointed out, Seraph glancing at the fox girl, perplexed at the look of genuine concern on her face. He sighed to himself and submitted.

“Alright, just take off these chains, Tikai,” Seraph replied, looking over at the blond who thought for a moment.

“Ok, I’ll take them off you, but,” Tikai’s expression suddenly lightened up into a strange grin, Seraph raising an eyebrow at the sudden change in tone. “But, I’m going to go with you,” Tikai added on, Seraph blinking at her, unsure if she was joking or not, at the moment he was fairly confident she was serious. Tikai’s statement also conjured up various images in the minds of her listeners, in turn they all turned a shade of crimson.

“W-Why?” Seraph inquired, his calm and cool composure shaking slightly. Tikai, who was totally unaffected by her statement, looked Seraph right in the eye and then spoke.

“I don’t want you to run away again, so you’re not getting out of my sight,” Tikai explained, the blush on Seraph’s face quickly leaving him as he remembered what he did a year ago.

“…Fine, just, turn away or something,” Seraph muttered, Tikai taking the chains off of the demon and leading him upstairs to a washroom, all the while getting starred at by their company, unsure if she really was just going with him to make sure he wouldn’t run away or not.

“Uh, Sonaris, you have other washrooms, right?” Ethernial asked, Sonaris nodding his head slowly.

“Yes…Uh, Yasosume, if you wanted to ‘fix’ that room, I don’t think I’d mind this time,” Sonaris proposed, everyone sharing a unanimous nod afterwards.

* * *

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to look, Seraph,” Tikai reassured, leaning against the wall in the bathroom. Seraph had taken his uniform and armor off, placing them next to the sink and was standing inside of the shower stall, covering up the semi translucent glass with many towels.

“Alright…I trust you,” Seraph replied quietly, turning on the water.

“You know…You gave me quite the scare back there, I almost didn’t make it in time,” Tikai spoke, Seraph letting out a muffled ‘mph’ in response.

“I know you don’t want to be here, but I can’t let you go like that…” Tikai continued, her voice becoming tearful and quiet as she kept speaking. There was no response from Seraph that time, Tikai deciding to remain silent and listen to the sound of the splashing water.

Seraph didn’t take long to finish cleaning up, feeling more relaxed to an extent afterwards.

“Look away,” Seraph instructed, Tikai quickly doing so. The demon stepped out of the stall, quickly dried himself off and began to put on his damp uniform.

“Uh, Seraph?” Tikai asked, the demon replying with a simple yes. “Are you…Going to keep running away from me?” She asked tentatively. Seraph paused in his dress for a moment and shrugged.

“We’ll see,” was all Seraph responded with. A surge of feelings piled up in Tikai, the girl spinning around and throwing her arms around Seraph.

“Please…Don’t. I spent so long looking for you already, I don’t want to give you up again,” Tikai whispered, her grip on Seraph tightening. Seraph remained motionless, he was enjoying the moment, the warmth of having someone’s arms around himself, but he quickly shook himself out of that train of thought.

“I need to finish putting my jacket on,” Seraph muttered plainly. Tikai sniffled for a moment and then let go of the demon who continued his monotonous task. When he finished putting his damp uniform back on he turned to look at Tikai, he knew she was on the verge of breaking down, and to be honest, he was also being strained to keep his composure intact.

“I suppose you want me to stay in your room, so you can keep an eye on me?” Seraph inquired. Tikai nodding slowly.

“Yeah.”

* * *

The rest of the night went by in the blink of an eye, Seraph found himself leaning against the wall opposite of Tikai’s bed in her room, there she lay asleep.

::Why am I here…? I haven’t proven anything other than how weak I am! But I can’t leave now…I don’t know what to do!:: Seraph shook his head and lowered it, listening to the rain as it hit against the window. He remained motionless for awhile until he decided to do something he never thought of; he closed his eyes and prayed.

“For what it’s worth, if there really is something there…Then I hope you can hear me,” Seraph began, hands clasped together tightly. “I pray for a chance to redeem myself to the people I’ve hurt…More importantly I pray for the strength to become a better person…I caused so much pain to the person I cared for during all this time, I left to try and better myself so I could return as someone good enough to be in her company again. I sank lower than mud to do what I was sent here for. And now I’m afraid it’s impossible for me to ever get out of it. If…I can not be granted this, then at least allow her to be happy without me, and it’ll be enough. Amen,” Seraph reopened his eyes, looking over at Tikai’s sleeping body, but to his surprise she was sitting up, looking at him through the darkness.

“I was scared you’d run away when I was sleeping, so I didn’t,” Tikai explained softly. Seraph looked away, embarrassed she had heard his entire confession. She climbed out of bed and walked over to Seraph, crouching down to be level with him. The demon looked at Tikai carefully before he quickly stood, his form looming over her and casting shadows across the room. Tikai also got to her feet, ready to tackle him to the ground in case he made another attempt at an escape. However instead of trying to escape he suddenly dropped to his hands and knees, lowering his head down to the ground; Seraph was bowing.

“Please, forgive me!” Seraph shouted desperately. “I wanted to become perfect for you, so I could make you happy, but it seems all I can do is make you miserable. So for failing you so many times, please, forgive me!” Seraph’s fearsome façade was no more, his voice no longer cold and stoic but full of emotion. All of his fear, his sorrow, all of it poured out at that moment, only then did Tikai realize the extent of the turmoil that Seraph hid away.

Seraph remained unmoved, waiting for whatever judgment she was going to pass onto him. Tikai smiled at the demon and then crouched down again, lifting his head up in her hands.

“I’m glad you’re not perfect, Seraph. If you were perfect then you’d be right about everything, and never wrong. That’d mean you’d be right about all of the bad things, and then you’d run away again, or kill yourself, and I won’t be able to stop you. If you were perfect, I’d never get you to look at me, so I’m glad you’re not,” Tikai recited, Seraph looking up at her confused.

“I know you’re not Airaxen, so don’t think I’m doing all this because of who you were once. I’m doing all this because I’m lonely. I’ve always been alone. I might be lying, and probably really am doing some of this because of who you were, but I just don’t want you to leave me like Airaxen did. I don’t care if you make me sad sometimes, that’s just life. So please…Don’t leave me,” Tikai requested, Seraph nodded his head quickly and sat up.

“If you really want this demon to watch over you, then I will, I’ll do anything you want if it means you’ll smile for me,” Seraph declared, Tikai smiling at the answer. The blond stood up and extended her hand towards Seraph.

“Come on, lets go for a walk in the rain. Let it wash away all of our pains and start clean.” Seraph looked at her hand carefully and then grabbed it tightly.

::I’m never letting go!:: Seraph thought to himself, a smile creeping over his face.

 

 

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